In or out? Slice of Life 1/31 #sol20

Before I even woke up I was already thinking, “should I?” Of course, I knew the answer: I should not.

I answered the question yesterday at a conference when I told my blogging buddy Lisa (over at https://alotalot.wordpress.com/) that I was only going to comment this year. I answered the question last week when another blogging friend messaged me and asked if I was participating. I didn’t write back because I couldn’t bear to say no (sorry, Elisabeth).

I answered the question at the beginning of February when our move date got pushed back to March 7. No one blogs every day for a month while they are teaching, finishing renovations, moving home, taking a course and, well, living. “That would be too much,” I told my husband sagely. He agreed.

This afternoon, I settled in to read blogs. I was already feeling a little sad about my very appropriate decision. I read Peter’s post “Working on my resume” and marveled at his decision to blog even though he knows he might not write every day this month. And something clicked.

My personal challenge right now – in so many ways – is to be kind to myself. I want to be kind to myself with all my imperfections. And here’s what I know: I love writing. I love the way I pay attention to life when I write daily for myself or for a blog. So kindness, for me, for this month, is participating in this challenge, accepting that I will be imperfect in my participation.

Slice: I am sitting on my bed in our tiny apartment. I can hear the kids in the next room. The cats wander aimlessly back and forth between us, meowing occasionally to remind us that it’s almost dinner time. My laptop is warm on my legs. Our things are helter skelter – in boxes or not, in drawers or not – as we prepare for our move in a week. I haven’t quite finished marking papers. I haven’t quite finished prepping for tomorrow’s lessons. I haven’t quite finished my next assignment for my class. Even with all that hanging over me, I feel light. I will take on the challenge of writing daily in March; and I will allow myself the kindness of failure without frustration. I will not miss out on the fun because I cannot be perfect. I will write.

Am I doing the Slice of Life Challenge this month? Yes, yes I am.

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