I parked in the tiny parking lot and sat in my car for a few minutes, hoping that the rain would let up. While I waited, I texted a friend to let her know I had arrived; we made plans to meet in a bit. That taken care of, I darted out of the car and towards the well-lit building. A young man – one of Mr. 16’s friends – said hello to me as I made my way up the stairs. There, a couple I’ve known for years were standing near an open door, so I paused to chat for a few minutes – kids, work, life. Luckily, no one was in no rush.
Eventually, a door down the hallway opened, and an old colleague gestured to me. I made my excuses to my friends and headed over to him. We embraced briefly and then caught up. He shared photos of his son – already two and a half! – and we laughed a bit about my youngest, now 14, and some of his antics in English class. Time flew; soon it was time to go.
This is how parent-teacher interviews go for me now that both of my children are in high school.
The next interview was across the courtyard, and I ran into several people I knew as I made my way to the classroom. There, a semi-familiar young teacher greeted me and reminded me that we had worked together a few years ago. “I’ve gained weight,” he said ruefully, “Imagine me, thinner.” Again, we used some of our ten minutes to catch up and some to talk about Mr. 14. When time was up, the next parent was a friend, so we all talked for a minute before I left them to their discussion.
Being the parent in these meetings is odd. I’ve taught in this school district for seventeen years now, and I’ve worked in four different high schools. Since I take pleasure in both collaboration and mentoring, and since new teachers often move around a bit before they get a contract, I’ve gotten to know a lot of teachers at a lot of schools. More than that, a few of my former students are now teachers (!!). These days, much to my children’s dismay, parent-teacher conferences are a semisocial event for me.
The third teacher on my appointment sheet was not able to make interviews – too bad, really, because she was the only person I didn’t already know. After I figured out that she was absent, I made my way back to the front hall of the school to wait for Mr. 16. He was serving as a guide for the evening, and it was still cold and rainy, so I had offered him a ride home. This meant I was free to stand in the lobby and chat with an old friend/colleague and talk about books, the upcoming PD Day, and changes in the school board. Soon, one of Mr. 16’s teachers joined us, and we began an animated discussion of AI and how it’s affecting learning. By the time Mr. 16 was released from his duties, we were gesturing with enough enthusiasm to be completely mortifying.
Eventually, parent-teacher conferences wound down. Before we left, I found the friend/ neighbour/ colleague who I had texted when I arrived, and we all walked out to the car together – of course we were also giving her a ride home. After we dropped off my friend, my child said, “It’s kind of cool that you know so many of my teachers.”
I’m glad he’s ok with it because apparently this is what it means for me to be a parent who teaches.
Persistence and Pedagogy 
“…much to my children’s dismay, parent-teacher conferences are a semisocial event for me.” Funny. I haven’t tested this… but I think in every piece you write you manage to sprinkle in humor. It’s your signature move. What an incredible skill to make a reader smile and laugh every time she reads your writing.
“I’ve taught in this school district for seventeen years now, and I’ve worked in four different high schools.” Incredible. Impressive experience! All the wisdom of these years as an educator navigating four different school cultures shows up in your writing.
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Glad your kids are so chill about the parent/teacher thing. I like how you weave your own life and the layers of life in teaching through this slice; it brings a human aspect to us a teachers.
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It’s a weird experience! I taught both of my children so when I go for their parent meetings now I run into many former students and their parents. So far I haven’t completely embarrassed either of my children. There’s still time! LOL I’m glad your son is okay with you knowing everyone!
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This was so fun to read! I love how you didn’t tell readers you were there for conferences until after the first conference–I had to go back to reread and catch all the hints I’d missed on the first read. You make this sound like such a fun night. If only all parents had this experience, I wonder if more of them would be more engaged.
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That’s just what I was trying to do- keep the beginning more like a gathering than obviously conferences. Thanks for noticing!
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and now you know every one
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Amanda,
I love the response from your sweet sixteen. That’s a big hug for you. I also love these spontaneous reunions. I had some flashbacks from my own similar experiences. Read this post when you need a reminder of the good things about teaching.
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I remember well how dismayed you were when I knew your teachers and worse the parents of your boy friends.
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That’s because you knew *everyone* 😂
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Of course you mentor teachers 🤍
Amanda, what a fun experience to live this moment with you. I often ask my husband about conferences in high school because I’m sure they are quite different from the ones we hold in elementary school.
I also love how you ended with Mr. 16’s comment!
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They are sooooo different. I once tried student-led conferences 😂🤣. Let’s just say the teens did NOT approve.
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Haha! Any chance you wrote a slice about it? 😉
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What a lovely evening…made even better by your son’s appreciation for knowing so many teachers. This is another example of the community you have built/found around you!
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The bonus of being a teacher AND a parent is priceless (in my opinion) as you get to see both perspectives (and as long as you have obliging and academically performing kids, as you obviously do!) Such an enjoyable slice and seeing how busy you are outside of teaching itself….! Makes me wish I’d become a teacher before I became a parent, instead of vice versa.
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This is a fascinating slice from the point of view of a parent-teacher. I have taught a lot of my colleague’s children over the years, so have had lots of experiences being the teacher meeting with a parent who is also a teacher in my building. It’s weird. I never stopped to think about what it would feel like from the point of view of the parent who is also a teacher. Thanks for sharing!
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I enjoyed being on the other side for conferences, but being in a different town from where I taught, I didn’t really get this kind of social/professional interaction. Then again, the introvert thing probably would’ve made my evening very different anyway. It sounds like you navigate it so well…even Mr 16 is okay with it.
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