I gave myself the summer off, mostly. From blogging, from prepping for classes, from worrying about who can or cannot read and what needs to change or stay the same. I tried to actually relax – or at least not to be actively stressed. I attend zero conferences. I abandoned books I didn’t like. I didn’t plan a big family trip. I hung out with friends and family and quit Twitter. Overall, I think I did ok.
I still have a week left before school starts, so this morning I rolled out of bed and plopped almost directly into our oversized beanbag to read a little of Jhumpa Lahiri’s Whereabouts. Instead of immersing myself in the story, however, I found myself wondering if I could finish it and return it to the library today, another item checked off the before-school to-do list that’s already filling up. My mind gleefully got into the go-getter groove, and soon I was listing as much as I was reading. Gah! Not what I had wanted.
I tried to shake off the looming lists and plans. I tried to read one more short chapter, but Hera – our cat – was having none of it. She scaled the back of the bean bag and dragged her tongue across my cheek. Skritch. Then she did it again. She clambered onto my chest, batted down the book, and looked me in the eyes. I knew she was right: time for tea and then into school to set up the classroom.
So I got up, neither fully relaxed nor fully tense, and lumbered down the stairs towards September.
Persistence and Pedagogy 
You’re back! I’ve missed your writing! It sounds like a divine summer. Love this: “My mind gleefully got into the go-getter groove…” I know this one. 😂 Lingering with Lahiri in the beanbag chair vs. lumbering toward September. A musical multi-speed post.
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Glad you caught the musicality of the post. I do love playing with alliteration.
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So glad that you were able to (mostly) give yourself the summer off…not an easy feat – though of course, I’m always glad to read your posts! Thinking of you as you lumber along towards, hopefully, a positive year. 🙂
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Thanks, Amanda. Hoping the year starts well tomorrow.
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I congratulate you for being able to rest well. Take the last out of the final week. May the new school year have a sense of summer in it.
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Ooh – a sense of summer in the school year. I like it. I’ll see if I can bring a little summer along.
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Amanda,
Sounds as though you’re in that nebulous in between place, neither in school form nor in summer mindset. It’s a discombobulating place, but listening to the cat nudges is a good starting place. Even in retirement I feel as though I’m there, and I ended up subbing the first day of school. Now I’m on the watch for sub job notifications.
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I honestly have no idea how I’ll possibly handle retirement (though I’ve got 8 years to think about it); that end of August vibe has been part of my life forever!
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I love that last line. That is what it feels like, isn’t it?
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Hera captured my heart! From her knowing what’s best for you to the details of how she communicated. Well done. Skritch is the perfect onomatopoeia for a cat lap to the skin.
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Hera is happy to have another fan. She certainly believes that she knows what’s what – and it almost always involves making me get up to get her more food. 🙂
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Amanda,
Congrats on taking a break. This line says so much “So I got up, neither fully relaxed nor fully tense, and lumbered down the stairs towards September.”
Have a wonderfully awesome YEAR!
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Here we go… hopefully tomorrow I have a spring in my step!
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OKAY OKAY! I’ll write today too. *sigh*. I don’t know how the people who don’t get summer off do it! Summer break is the best.
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Right? Look, if you don’t want to teach, summer break won’t be enough, but if you *do* want to teach, it really is glorious.
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Yay for you for giving yourself permission to do whatever you needed to do to rest, relax, rejuvenate. It’s great to “hear” your voice again. By the way, I definitely appreciate your use of the word “lumbered”. Well done! I hope your day at school felt pretty good. For myself, the thing I enjoy most about summer vacation is puttering and the lovely realization that being inefficient is okay. More than okay, really.
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Puttering – I do love puttering & the school year is not the right time for it. I’m hoping that tomorrow sees me doing something other than lumbering!
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What a great image at the end there, and a clever cat! It reminded me too of how we can tell ourselves to push the thoughts of what we need to do out of our heads, but often we just need to write them down (or start to tackle them!) in order to get back that space to relax. I hope you felt productive and then got some much-needed rest!
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I am a HUGE fan of bedside lists – just write those thoughts down & get back to resting. Here’s hoping I get some sleep tonight!
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I love the line “lumbered down the stairs towards September.” Boy does it feel like that? Right??
I also love that you have yourself permission to abandon books you didn’t like. I had to give myself permission for this too. I was 200 pages into one that I finally just said, enough! There are soooooo many books out there, why am I wasting my time on one I don’t like!
Good luck getting ready for school!
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I still find it hard to abandon books – I doubt I’ll ever get used to it – but I’m practicing. And boy did I practice this summer – hahaha
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nice echo of Yeats in your last line there, friend.
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So glad you caught that. Andre said I should have written something that ended with “tired teacher slouching toward the school year” – but surely that would have been too much – hahaha
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Love it. ‘Lumbered towards Sept’ Meanwhi
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