Runaway #SOL24 20/31

He rarely comes to class, but when he does, we do what we can to make sure he has at least a little success. He’s in grade 9 and is currently illiterate in three languages. Research says that students with strong reading skills in their home languages often also have strong reading skills in their second language (see Short & Fitzsimmons, 2007 or this shorter article by Fred Genesee), but he doesn’t have strong reading skills anywhere. We can’t turn back time, but we’re doing what we can to move forward.

He’s lucky because this class has a push-in support teacher. She’s technically there for other students, but no rule says that she can only help them, so we’re using what wiggle room we have to create as much space for him as possible. When we were writing 100-word memoirs, she just happened to be sitting near him and just happened to be able to scribe for him. As I circulated, their heads were close together in front of the computer, counting words. When he realized he had written a story of exactly 100 words, he was so proud that he asked her to read it to him again. He beamed. Then he skipped for three days.

Then next time he made it to class during reading time, I sat with him and quietly talked through The Invention of Hugo Cabret, which he likes because it’s thick and he says it makes him look smart, while Ms H kept an eye on the other readers. Even the pictures were hard for him to understand, but he liked talking about them. Then he refused to do anything else.

Sometimes, he comes to class (late) and then asks to get water or go to the bathroom. I put him off as long as I can, but I am not the arbiter of his bodily functions; when he says, “Miss, I really have to go,” I let him. Sometimes he comes right back, but sometimes he runs. Two days ago, he swore he would only be gone for two minutes, then he took the hall pass and disappeared. I found him in the lobby later that day, skipping a different class. While we walked to where he was supposed to be, he told me that he had thrown up that morning, so he couldn’t return to my class. Given that he was practically bouncing up and down with energy as we edged towards his class, I reminded him that usually someone who throws up goes home, but he said he called home and his mother said no. Ahem. I found him in the hallways again that period and once the next period. He told me he just can’t stay in class.

Yesterday, Ms H had a breakthrough. She saw him (in the hallway, of course) and made some sort of deal/ bet with him – and then he actually showed up to English class a mere 10 minutes late (thus missing most of reading time). Meanwhile, she had hatched a plan. She took him to a quiet room – but not the resource room; he refuses to go there – and she started a phonics assessment with him. She praised him for what he could do and talked about ways we could help. She told him she could start with what he can do instead of expecting him to be able to do impossible things. He was eager.

Ms H was excited that we’d found a way to start giving him some real support. That afternoon we talked through her plan. But this morning, he saw her in the hall during first period, turned around and went the other way. Then, he saw her at the beginning of our class. This time he ran away. Ran.

We stayed after class together, Ms H and I, trying to figure out how to help him accept our offers of support. We reminded ourselves that years of failing in school, years of hiding his weaknesses, mean that he probably thinks he’s beyond redemption. He may be afraid that he’ll just fail again and disappoint us in the process. We walked into the hallway partway through lunch, and there he was, right by our English classroom. Gotcha! Gently, we reminded him of his (broken) promise. I told him that it hurt Ms H’s feelings when he didn’t come. She told him that she had been really excited to see him today. He shifted his weight back and forth, back and forth. When we finished – maybe a 30 second “chat” – he said, “OK” and then… he ran.

Sweet runaway boy, how I hope you’ll let us try to help you read. Reading will make a bigger difference than you can imagine. It’s worth sticking around for.

10 thoughts on “Runaway #SOL24 20/31

  1. Oh, Amanda. I felt this post in my heart. I have had a few students like this, but I’ve only taught in 3rd-5th grade. If then, the inability to read affects a child’s self-confidence and desire to be in school, I can only imagine what it does to an older student. You paint a vivid picture. But you and your coworker’s willingness to help him and meet him where he is at are exactly what he needs. I hope he starts to stay more and run less. One step at a time.

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  2. Oh, dear friend,

    You have captured this brilliantly. This kiddo is so very, very lucky to have not one, but two adults in the building working to try and make things manageable for him.

    Tonight, I went for a haircut. When I visit my hairdresser, we reverse the “traditional ” roles. He talks, I listen. He is parenting a learner who needs a great deal of support (who I taught). Said kiddo is in semester 2 of Grade 9, and in another context, could very much be a runner (and has been)

    Please keep doing the work you are doing. I know you know it makes a difference. 

    Also – this is the kind of story I want to share with people who don’t understand the work you do.

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  3. You always find the students that need you the most…and then you commit yourself to doing everything you can to help them see what you see. You are a gift. I hope you catch this one. It sounds like he really needs you.

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  4. I love this piece so much. Because we can all relate, to some extent. Because we are rooting for him, again and again. Because the teachers are undeterred and we are rooting for them too. And because you have captured it all and offered it up for us to connect and enjoy.

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  5. Amanda,

    My heart hurts for this boy. Breaks for him. But it also makes me angry to think about how so many have failed him along the way. You and your colleague are working so hard for him, and I feel your sadness and share it. I hope and pray he’ll feel your love and stop running.

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  6. “We stayed after class together, Ms H and I, trying to figure out how to help him accept our offers of support. We reminded ourselves that years of failing in school, years of hiding his weaknesses, mean that he probably thinks he’s beyond redemption. He may be afraid that he’ll just fail again and disappoint us in the process.”

    It’s going to take a lot of love and persistence (Hey, isn’t persistence part of the name of this blog?!?!) to help him work thorugh this. But no one is beyond redemption, as you well know. He will get there since I know how much you care about your students.

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  7. This painfully true story is a testament to the depth of your capacity to care and your creative problem solving. Unfortunately, it’s also a testament to significant problems in our education system especially for some multilingual students.

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